3am Saturday morning…
Hannah: Pulls herself up to stand in her cot. “Lalalala. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmm. Mamamamamam. Guh. Guh. Guh. Ha, ha. Hahahaha. Dadadadadada. Lur. Lur.
Then….silence for a moment….
At this juncture, Hannah expels an excessive amount of gas from her *coughs* derriere (sorry, too graphic?) and then laughs (I didn’t teach her that – honest!)
Then…..Lalalalalala. Muh, muh, muh,mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Lur. Lur. Lur. Wah. Wah. Ah, haaaaaaaa. Hahahahahahah. Yarhhhh. Gur. Gurgurgur. Weeee. He he he he”
And so it went on…and on…and on….
Me: Rolls over in bed. “Did you hear that? She said “Dadadada. That’s new.”
Hannah’s daddy: “Yep, I heard it”
Me: Gets out of bed and goes to speak to Hannah. “Hannah, it’s bed time”
Hannah: “hahahahahaha”. *Lies back down in cot* Hahahahah. Mmmmm. Ahaaaaaaa. Mmmmmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmm. Muh. Muh. Muh. Mmmmm”.
Then…blissful, middle of the night silence ensues.
4.30am, the same Saturday morning!!!!!!!!!
Hannah: “hahahahahahah. Hah. Guh. Guh. Guh. Mmmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmmmm. Lur. Lur. Hahahahaha.
And so it went on….and on…and on…
Hannah’s Daddy gets up, rather blurry eyed, and goes to make a (much needed!) cup of espresso. He’s not daft. He knows resistance (i.e. staying in bed) is futile!
Me: “Hannah. It’s bed time”. Annie then stumbles back into bed and tries to ignore the singing. To no avail.
*another BIG sigh*
You see, once the singing starts, there’s no stopping it.
So I just lie in bed for a bit longer, being Hannah’s captive audience.
We seem to be getting more and more of this ‘up before the dawn chorus’ malarkey and I’m not entirely sure why. It’s not even light outside!
Let’s hope it’s just a blip though, because I really need my sleep, otherwise, I can hardly string a sentence together during the day.
Nothing new there then, huh?
But I’m not complaining. Not at all. Because Hannah seems to be making many more ‘vocalisations’ recently. I’m not really sure why – she could be stimming (self-stimulatory behaviour), it could just be REALLY good fun in the middle of the night, she could be wanting to experiment with more sounds now, or whatever, but only Hannah can tell us the reasons why. The tone changes – up and down, down and up – it’s very unpredictable and she’s far more vocal when she’s in bed. It’s as if she finds it easier to make all those lovely ranges when she doesn’t have any distractions, like light or other sounds or toys…or maybe even people.
I certainly don’t.
And, as much as it could be rather annoying to many people being woken at silly o’clock, for me, It’s rather…well…lovely (although I would, very much indeed – please, Hannah! – relish a few hours longer in bed…just me and my duvet…one weekend…at some point in the future).
I don’t hear any definite words forming when Hannah’s singing. Sadly! But I hear sounds that could have the potential to form words. And one day, she may even say something….and that would be just utterly, wonderfully heavenly…and undoubtedly one of the happiest days of my life.
I’ll always live in hope.
(n.b. for more about this, please look at my blog post ‘Expletive on a cake’)
But when she’s singing, she’s happy.
And if she’s happy, then I’m happy.
Although we seem to hear less of this range of sounds during the day, Hannah still makes her presence known with her sing song noises. And as much as I like it, it’s apparent that some people don’t when we’re out and about.
I’ll give you just one example (of many):
We were on our way back from a holiday in Cornwall last year (just in case you didn’t know, WE LOVE CORNWALL!!!!!)….
Stopping off at Gloucester services (LOVE that place too), we’d timed it so that we could eat our evening meal there with Hannah before we landed home. The weather was so lovely (despite it being September…in the UK) that we decided to eat outside. There were several other people out there but plenty of places to sit, so we chose to sit out of the way so that we didn’t block anyone in with Hannah’s clumpy old pram (we have a posh new one now. One she’s comfy in – yay!). We gave Hannah her food, then began to eat our own meals.
Other people came to sit outside, including (I assume) a family; consisting of mum, dad and almost adult daughter.
Hannah continued to sing away relatively quietly whilst we ate and intermittently signed ‘more’ when she wanted to taste something we were eating – despite having finished her own mahoosive meal.
Honestly, I don’t know where she puts it all…she’s such a skinny malinky!
Anyway, I digress. I’m good at that! Sorry…
As far as I could tell, no-one really seemed to ‘bat an eye’ (i.e. bother) about Hannah’s singing.
However, I DID notice and hear aforementioned mum and daughter sniggering, whilst looking over at us, after ‘dad’ had made a ‘comment’. I suspect (by the vibe I was getting) that it wasn’t particularly complementary and it was clearly directed at us – the giveaway being that he cocked his head in our direction.
(n.b. for those wishing to have an opinion on whether I have paranoia, please don’t waste your thoughts. I’m SO not paranoid. I’m just experienced in ‘reading’ people…I’ve had plenty of practice!)
Whilst dad occupied himself by leaning over his plate, stuffing his face and making attempts to impress his family with his droll quips, I looked over and held mums gaze – enough to make her feel uncomfortable and wipe the smile off her face. I then smiled (sweetly, but with an underlying hint of venom in my eyes – my delightfully heinous friend, Ian, would have been SO impressed with the look, he’d have even applauded!) and then I got on with enjoying my food.
Neither I nor my family need to put up with stuff like that. We have enough to deal with.
It would have been really easy to go over and say something…although it wouldn’t have been as easy trying to restrain Hannah’s daddy from punching this guy in the throat!
But I didn’t….we didn’t.
They weren’t worth it, plus we don’t condone violence of any sort at Broccoli HQ.
I’ll just leave Karma to do its delightful stuff.
I like Karma VERY much!
But, whilst writing this, I do wonder a little how either of those adults would feel or react if someone said something unkind about their daughter…and I wonder whether their aspirations for her are to become an individual who is accepting of ALL people, despite their differences.
I think, perhaps, not. They’re probably OK in their own little world, so that’s all that matters.
What’s blatantly obvious though is that they lacked the intelligence to leave their behaviours until either we or they had left and were out of earshot.
…and evidently, they lack empathy.
…or actually, they may just be plain ignorant and get their kicks from sniggering at little girls with additional needs.
Oh, I can’t tell you how much I LOATHE sniggerers!
Blimey, I’d better stop there. I’m at risk of having a bit of a rant!
Sorry about that.
Anyway, I’ve NEVER apologised for Hannah making noises or singing or any other of her little idiosyncrasies (apart from when she bites someone – whoops!) and I don’t ever intend to do either. She has as much right as anyone else to make a sound. She may not be able to talk, but I’d never, EVER want to quash her attempts at expressing herself.
So if Hannah’s ‘singing’ means offending some bloke having his tea, or anyone else for that matter, then so be it. If they have a problem, they can come and tell me about it….and then I’ll deal with them.
I may even educate them a little in the process!
Well, I suppose it’s worth a try.
And by doing so, if the grown-ups are given a little bit of enlightenment, then maybe, hopefully, their kids won’t develop the same unpalatable characteristics as their parents.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m fine with people glancing over if they hear something out of the ordinary – that really doesn’t faze me and it seems like a totally natural thing to do. What I’m SO not OK with (and probably never will be) are starers or unforgivable comments. Nuh huh. NOT. AT. ALL. I don’t forgive.
So, let’s wrap this up shall we?, before I get on my high horse again.
To conclude: I hope that my little Songbird will continue to remain oblivious to the haters. She’ll continue to sing as much and as often as she wants and hopefully, one day, that song may even just turn into a word….or two…or even a whole vocabulary!
And I’ll continue to live in hope, deal with said haters, forego my beloved sleep (hopefully not too much though!) and put my faith in Karma!
So, that’s almost all for this post my lovelies.
But let me finish with a beautiful quote from Ella Fitzgerald…
“The only thing better than singing is more singing”
(although, not at 3am, please Hannah!)
Thanks for stopping by.
Until next time.
This post is dedicated to all the little Songbirds out there…keep on singing my darlings…don’t ever allow anyone to stop you from expressing yourself ❤
…and to Hannah's wonderful Teacher and TA's this year…for their commitment and much, much more.